The Pursuit of Hegemonic Masculinity: Violence as a Compensatory Act of Manhood in Vivek Shraya’s I’m Afraid of Men (2018)

This paper explores how violence or the threat of violence acts as a tool to preserve hegemonic masculinity, and punish nonbinary individuals who deviate from normative gender expectations in Vivek Shraya’s I’m Afraid of Men (2018). Shraya’s memoir provides a nuanced exploration of how ‘manly’ stereotypes are ingrained in the cultural construction of masculinity—highlighting the ensuing violence and fear of being labeled as ‘unmasculine.’ The profound impact of this violence on Shraya’s choices and identity exposes the sociocultural belief in the respectability of only the virile, aggressive, and hegemonic masculine, dehumanizing all alternative masculinities. Applying J.E. Sumerau’s (2020) theory of Violence as a Compensatory Act of Manhood, this paper reveals how non-conforming individuals are forced to confront violence for defying binary categorization, or perform violence to ‘be man enough.’ Sumerau, like Shraya, is an American non-binary trans woman whose theory is grounded in personal experiences and interviews with men who conform to hegemonic ideals. Her framework illustrates how men often resort to violence as a means of asserting or reclaiming their masculinity when they feel out of control, emphasizing that masculinity is not inherent but socially-coerced in the pursuit to attain hegemonic manhood. Shraya faces the same socialization that enforces a violent conception of manhood, struggling against societal pressures to compensate for perceived masculine ‘deficits.’ The paper looks into the interplay between violence and masculinity, providing insight into the underlying factors that contribute to men’s violent behavior, facilitating and promoting the acceptance of alternative masculinities.

Keywords: compensatory manhood acts, hegemonic masculinity, J. E. Sumerau, violent manhood, Vivek Shraya